Do you know how to hide your high? For every new, inexperienced toker that swears they “don’t feel high, bro,” there’s an experienced blazer who knows what greening out is.
What’s even more common? Getting caught being high at a time or a place you’re not supposed to – just look at the countless stories on Reddit detailing the horror stories of ingesting too much of a good green thing.
If you live in an uptight community, have non-open-minded family members, or are in a situation where you’re not supposed to be high, knowing how to hide your high is essential.
Have you ever wondered how seasoned smokers can look so cool, calm and collected despite smoking the same amount or even more than yourself? Sure, their weed tolerance plays a part, but it’s more likely that they know how to keep their weed inhibitions in check.
In other words, they know how to hide their high.
If you don’t, we’re here today to show you how to do just that. Here are 5 tips to help you hide your high.
How to Hide Your High
1. Keep it Simple
Ever heard of the KISS acronym? It stands for ‘Keep it Simple, Stupid.’ It’s an old war-time slogan used to help soldiers and military systems operate at maximum capacity.
If you’ve been smoking on some good kush, chances are you’re going to be some sort of stupid.
If you’re forced to engage in conversation or social interaction with someone, try your best not to engage in any profound, philosophical talks. Otherwise, they may notice that you smoked too much of your favourite sticky icky.
Your mind will be inquisitive, but all that THC coursing through your veins is going to limit your brain’s ability to keep your thoughts focused for more than 10 seconds at a time.
Remember – Keep It Simple, Stupid. You’re high and probably stupid at the moment. The other person/party is not.
Say your piece, don’t ask any probing questions, and move away from the conversation as soon as possible.
2. Don’t Reek Like Weed
Weed smells, and you don’t have to be a smoker to recognize the pungent, ashy smell of a burnt joint or a finished bowl.
One of the best things you can do is to smoke outside and keep moving to mitigate some of the smell. Doing so will prevent the dank smell from sticking onto your clothes.
However, even if you do your best in preventing the dank weed smoke from sticking to your body and hair, there’s still the possibility that your mouth and your hands could smell dank.
If you can, wash your hands immediately after you finish seshing and try to give your teeth a quick brush, too. Brushing your teeth not only makes your mouth smell minty fresh but also helps clear up any tar that may have been left behind by the joint or bowl you’ve been smoking.
A full shower isn’t necessary, but it might be a good idea after a hotboxing session or smoking indoors. A quick spritz of body spray or perfume should be enough to keep most people unaware, that is, if you follow our above tips!
A foolproof way to eliminate smells as a cause for concern and something that will keep your partaking in some gorgeous ganja under wraps is opting for products that don’t smell strongly in the first place.
Again, it’s about not being stupid! If you’re in an area where the classic weed stench will be a dead giveaway, think smarter, not harder. THC syrup, THC-infused drinks and THC tinctures are examples of excellent products to ensure you remain low key while still experiencing high key results.
Look. We get it. There’s a pleasant nostalgia that comes with toking from a joint or hitting a bong. That said, there is a time and place for everything. The above items are ideal for dosing discreetly and accurately without fearing that you’ll stink up the place.
3. Hide Your Eyes to Protect Your High
Just as Phil Collins sang, it’s in your eyes. One of the most obvious tell-tale signs that someone has been indulging in that good chronic is red, bloodshot eyes.
In other words, if you want to hide your high, protect your eyes.
If it’s seasonally appropriate, bring a pair of sunglasses that you can wear after you smoke. It’ll cover the fact that your eyes are bloodshot. It will also help you feel more confident when you don’t have to worry about people seeing your eyes.
Obviously, take them off when you go inside. Wearing sunglasses indoors is almost a dead giveaway that you just hit some reefer.
Eye drops are another great way to keep your eyes moist and not as red. Keeping a vial in your pocket or bag could prove immensely useful, especially during the colder months where sunglasses aren’t as common or appropriate.
4. Control the Giggles
Tip number 4 in learning how to hide your high is closely related to tip number 1. Ever experienced a giggling fit that makes your stomach hurt from laughing too much?
Such an experience is all too common when you’re high.
Part of the reason you should keep conversations simple is because of this tip. The longer you talk to someone, the longer the irrationally comedic part of your brain has to latch onto something stupid to laugh at.
Think you can hold it together? Believe us.
You can’t. Been there, tried that, failed stupendously.
5. Plan Ahead
What’s the absolute best way to hide your high? First and foremost, it would be not to hide it at all. However, if that’s not an option, channel your inner boy scout. Always be prepared.
Okay. Hear us out.
It’s all about having a contingency plan in the scenario where you might get caught being high at a time or place you’re not supposed to be.
Are you wearing sunglasses indoors? It’s because of your pounding migraine.
Smelling like you just dunked your head into a barrel of body spray? You just had, or are going to have a hot date.
Are you not responding to the conversation? It’s because you’re tired, and you’ve had a long day.
Depending on who you’ll have to hide your high from, it’s essential to have these contingency plans in place in case they grow suspicious.
If somebody is already suspicious of you smoking and you head out for 10-15 minutes only to come back wearing sunglasses smelling like a Grade 8 boy’s locker room after gym class, chances are they’re going to be suspicious.
Hide Your High – Be a Sneaky Stoner
Learning how to hide your high isn’t difficult. However, it is, unfortunately, one of those skills that only grows the more you use it.
While we hope you live in a progressive place/with enlightened people that won’t judge or prosecute you for enjoying a bit of jazz leaf, these 5 tips on how to hide your high might just prove essential when the occasion arises.
If you’re a bit too high for even your own liking and would like to alleviate some of the effects and sober up either for yourself or someone else’s sake, there are ways to do that.
It may seem like a weird concept but stick with us.
CBD is a fantastic tool for combatting the adverse effects of indulging a bit too heavily in your favourite icky sticky. It possesses multiple healing properties that will help bring you back to earth and maintain, at the very least, a grasp on functionality.
So, if you’re in a pinch, CBD could be just what you need.
Happy trails and good luck!